This post was generated during my workshop on how to manage science careers while going through pregnancy, parenthood, and other aspects of family life.
I am the oldest woman in 4+ generations of women on my mom's side to not already have a child. This is because I have prioritized my career as a scientist. When I think about the implications of being a mom and also an early career biologist I feel overwhelmed. The initial idea for this workshop came from my own desire to ask working scientists how their family life and work life coexist. I found myself in seminars listening to the stories of how scientists navigated their academic journey and then employment. While trying to take in their research I would be wondering when they started a family, how difficult it was to find jobs while being a parent or spouse, and how they deal with childcare needs. These are questions that aren't exactly expected during a Q&A session of a normal seminar and can be uncomfortable to ask. I decided creating a designated workshop where panelists are open to discussing their personal lives would be helpful for graduate students who are considering family lives and their developing careers. Here are some of the main questions the panelists were asked to answer, and the take home messages that came out of this workshop.
When is the best time to start a family if you intend on being a biologist?
Answer: The best time to start a family is whenever you feel ready. You can't plan a perfect time to have or adopt children. There will always be complications, challenges, and struggles. It is best to live your life your own way, without placing expectations on yourself. Some of our panelists had kids during grad school, some during their first year as a professor, some well into their careers. None of the panelists regreted the time they started a family. Some things to consider are how much flexibility you have over your time, the culture of your institution and what accomodations you may need, and your support system.
Wh0 was your support system, how did you manage childcare?
Answer: Some panelists have very supportive grandparent networks, while others rely on the kindness of labmates, some use fulltime daycare. It was mentioned that having a spouse is extremely helpful but definately not a deal breaker (the single mothers on the panels are absolutely the most badass people I've ever met). Daycare is often offered at a discounted rate if you attend or work at a university. It is becoming more accepted for mothers to bring their children who are too young for daycare or school into the office or the lab.
How do you tell your boss or advisor about a pregnancy or being a parent?
Answer: The best advice was to tell your advisor as early as you feel comfortable, particularly if you will be in a lab environment which may be hazardous. Be aware that sometimes telling an advisor early meant that word of the pregnancy was spread throughout the place of work before the expectant mother had really been ready to share the information broadly. Be very direct if you want the information about the pregnancy to stay private. Hopefully your advisor will be supportive, however many have nerves about being open about pregnancy or being a parent. Most universities and places of work have HR departments, Safety offices, or Diversity Offices that often have packets that can be given to an advisor that will have information about what resources a grad student or employee will need. It is then the advisors responsibility to read up on these needs. It is very important to know that your life as a person is just as important as your life as a scientist and you should never feel guilty for prioritizing your personal life. If you encounter a situation where you feel unsuported, advocate for yourself or reach out to other trusted members of the department who may be willing to advocate for your needs.
What accomodations did you value that were offered by your place of work?
Answer: Lactation rooms are very helpful, as well as a good maternity/paternity leave package. With pregnancy complications or health issues for the child or mother it was appreciated that places of work sometimes provided extended sick leave.
Do you feel that you get to spend enough time with your family?
Answer: Those that work in academia really like having a lot of time in the summer to spend with their family. Grad student parents appreciate the flexibility of working on research while being a parent, though teaching can be a limiting factor on time with family. Those that work in governmental agencies noted the value of having set hours and knowing that time at home would not be spent answering emails. All panelists commented that it is very important to have boundaries and to be very clear with your collegues that when you are not at work you will be unavailable to attend to work related issues. It is okay to be firm about your time off.
Was it harder to find a job as a parent?
Answer: It is more accepted now than ever before that people have a strong work life balance. It may be more difficult to find places of work where your work hours fit nicely with having a family, but it is definitely not impossible. Most of our panelists didn't struggle with finding employment any more than their non-parent counterparts did. If you are applying for a postition and your status as a parent or expectant mother is called into question, consider how the culture of that workplace may impact your hapiness. Support is really essential to enjoying being a parent and also a scientist and working at a place that causes you to feel guilt over the time it takes to have a family may not be an ideal location to set yourself up at.
The Biggest Take Home Messages From The Workshop
1. Normalize it: It is encouraged to normalize being a parent, normalize bringing children into work places, asking for time off to care for children or to attend children's events. Normalize pregnancy and asking for accomodations. Normalize setting boundaries for work hours and home hours.
2. Determine Childcare Early: daycares can often have a long waiting list. Plans for childcare with friends and family can fall apart. There are grants for financial assistance with childcare but they need to be applied for early.
3. Refuse to let parenthood derail your career goals: It is very possible to be a parent, have a family, and have a career in biology or other sciences. It is helpful to have a network of other parent collegues that you can turn to for support and to ask questions. Any of our panelists are happy to answer questions and concerns about parenthood and balancing their careers with family life.
A huge thank you to all of the panelists that contributed to this workshop. It would not have been possible to address these questions without your honesty and willingness to share your stories. If anyone is interested in contacting any of our panelists or has further questions please email me at drsatterfield@ucdavis.edu